“Stupid Cupid, stop picking on me!” The lines of a famous song, and lines which are all too apt to many women – the many women who, time after time, are disappointed when their dates fail to live up to the expectation. The following situations happen again and again.

You are attracted to a man only to find out that he can’t stop lying.

You meet a guy who turns you on, but who is secretly married.

You date a man who sounded perfect over the internet but who, in reality, has some odd peculiarities.

The fact of the matter is that love is like swings and roundabout. You win some and you lose some. Take it from me. I am a woman who’s been there and got the the shirt, but I finally got it figured out and now, I am willing to share my recipe for success with you. Here is how it works:

A lot of guys are just for the moment. It is never meant to be that you develop long term relationships with them. They are great at the time, but that time is short-lived. Enjoy the experience while you can and move on.

In reality, to find your true soul-mate, you've got to take control of things. You’ve got to know exactly what it is you are looking for in a man and to be able to recognize it when Mr. Right comes along to give you the happy ever after ending.

No two women are the same. We all have different goals in one way or another. However, here are a few common characteristics that indicate when a guy is not right for you.

Best man-friend is not best partner

It’s great to have a good man-friend who you can go to when times are tough or you have something you want to check out and get a second opinion on. Your best girl friend is one thing, but a good man-friend can give you a male perspective on things too. If you have a good man-friend, he will be the sort of person who can help with both physical chores and emotional issues too.

But this sort of relationship is a platonic one. That’s why it works so well. If you allow it to become physical, it loses its special value. This guy is a great friend – but he’s not your soul-mate.

Mr. Self-centered

So many men are all about themselves. They don’t value their women’s feeling or their opinions. This type of guy is to be avoided at all costs. He is only interested what is important to him and him alone. He is not the sort of guy to try and build a relationship with.

Mr. Untrustworthy

When you are trying to build a long lasting relationship with someone, the key foundation is trust. If you can’t trust him further than you can throw him, dump him, fast!

Beware the black hole

In science terminology a black hole is something that just sucks in all matter. If you are in a relationship like this, where you are always have to give, give, give and nothing is forthcoming, you need to engage “warp drive” and get the hell out of there.

The man who constantly compares you to others

The last thing any woman wants is a man who constantly looks at other women, and compares you to them. If you are not the only woman in his world, he is not deserving of your love.

The man with different beliefs to you

A good partnership is just that – a PARTNERSHIP. In any good partnership, both parties work together equally for the best of the relationship. If you don’t share common beliefs and goals, that partnership is not going to go the distance. You’ll be constantly warring and none one will be satisfied.

Mr. Someone else’s husband

We can’t always help who we are attracted to, but someone else’s husband is a no-no. One way or another, getting involved with a married man is a recipe for disaster.

The square peg and the round hole

Square pegs and holes, and round pegs and holes are great fits. But trying to put the wrong shaped peg into the wrong shaped hole just is not going to work, no matter how hard to bash it.

Mr. Unreliable

Being with a man who is unreliable is a total nightmare. If he never does what you ask him, or what he says he is going to do, you will always be on tenterhooks. Your life will be one long, nervous wait. Get out of there!

For better – for worse

As well as being one of the lines of the marriage vows, this is also a good way of summing up your man’s potential. Grab a pen and a sheet of paper, and jot down his good points on one side of the paper and the bad on the other. The conclusion will be self evident.